Well, Really ....

OK, I have realized after rereading the last post, that I use the word 'really' way too much. I'm going to work on that. It's easy to get into bad habits with language. Not as easy to get out of them.

Tomorrow my son and his partner, and my brother will arrive for the big family party on Saturday. Some of the ones who live far away have backed out. I don't blame them. The weather is foul in the parts of the country where they would be coming from, and I would hate for somebody I care about to get hurt trying to get here. We will miss them, but so be it. I'm starting to get excited now about seeing everybody. Not that I wasn't excited before, but I faced a lot of 'have-tos' this week and I needed to get through them all. Just about done with the last thing, cleaning the house, and I will be ready for company by noon tomorrow when they begin to arrive.

My dear SO has been so helpful and patient with me. He's come now to understand the frenzy I get into when I've got this stuff going on, people coming to visit, wanting everything to be perfect. I am trying not to be quite so uptight but I'm not sure I'm doing a great job of it.

On a lighter note: I went to the pet store earlier this week to get some replacement fish for the aquarium. My pleco had suddenly died, although he was never a particularly healthy one compared to others I've had in the past. He wasn't growing for one thing, and plecos are notorious growers! While I was there I got a few danios to round out the tank. Had lots of room for more fish. These are kind of lime-yellow and very active. Anyway, once I got them home, the dog discovered them. She had never paid a bit of attention to the tank before, but all day long she sat in front of it, just staring in fascination. Problem was the spot where she laid blocked the way for the kitty to go upstairs to his food bowl and litter box, so after several tolerant hours, he finally had enough of her there, and ran at her all puffed up and hissy. It always scares her when he does that, so she moved. But she continued later to stare at the "swimming lizards" in the tank. It was kind of cute. Today, she's back to ignoring the fish.

We moved the desk from the SO's old place out to the guest room across the garage. As soon as this week is through, I'm moving some of my work from upstairs out there, like the endless novel, for one thing. After having read my friend's manuscript, I'm gassed up about writing again.

Onward .....

The Coast, The Holidays, The Mountains

Waiting on a norther this morning. It was supposed to have arrived last night around midnight, but here it is, 7:00 am and it hasn't got here yet.

We went down to the Coast on Friday, just spent one night, but we went over to our favorite eating place, sat out on the back patio, had raw oysters and shrimp nachos, a few beers, and watched the pier lights play on the calm bay water. Reflections rippled as the sun went down. There's a part of me that really loathes the thought of giving that up, but we have made up our minds to do it, and sort of spread the word that our place was for sale if there were any interested parties around. We payed a visit to the people who bought the other trailer down there. They seem thrilled with their bargain and have really moved in well, made friends. They're the type who will participate in all the community activities that we never did.

Read DOWN RIVER by John Hart. He's a good writer, and there were some parts of this book I really liked, but I think I'm just not really a great mystery reader. This was a second book with this main character, and maybe I should have read the first one, but I really had a hard time finding a character I really liked. My SO, however, accused me of being hypercritical and unable to enjoy a work of fiction. He's partly right. Anyway, he obviously liked the book more than I did. Maybe it's written for a male reader, I don't know. I swear, I just don't think I'll ever have my finger on the pulse of what's a bestseller and what's not.

On the other hand, I did enjoy the silly movie we watched last night, "Prince of Persia, the Sands of Time." It was outlandish, but I had tried once to play the video game, so I saw the cleverness of how they had incorporated the various levels and obstacles into the storyline. Still, it was just another movie made for 14-year-old boys. That's simply how it is nowadays.

We cleaned up the garage and hung the outside Christmas lights. Today we will do the tree. I've already been busy all week getting the house ready for the big party next Saturday. What seemed like a great idea last May is now almost overwhelming me. I have no idea where we're going to PUT 33 people in this house. A friend is loaning me two card tables. Without them, I can seat at most 16 to a table, or 22 total. About 8 or 9 of the 33 will be kids, which has pretty much knocked my SO off his beam. Neither of us is really big on kids, but what do you do -- say No Kids. Of course not. And since these are all my cousins, I think I'll feel differently about this particular bunch of kids. My SO only says he's anxious to meet my brother, but hopefully he will enjoy himself as best he can in this kind of loaded situation. Maybe I shouldn't have put him through all this. But as he has himself said, I've "suffered through" many family gatherings of his, both here and at other places. Truth is, though, it hasn't been suffering for me. I enjoy socializing more than he does.

We have decided to go to the mountains right after Christmas. Our original intention was to spend New Year's at the Coast one last time, but we are both champing at the bit to get back to the cabin. And his granddaughter and her boyfriend are going to join us there. They won't to go skiing. Ah, to be that young ....

Onward.

Thanksgiving

Just finished Thanksgiving with the parents -- my dad and my SO's mom. His mom is a lady's lady, church-going, prim and proper. So what does Daddy do first thing? Came in telling a "dick" joke, so inappropriate, so embarrassing. It was met with absolute silence, except for an awkward chuckle from my SO. Daddy is having a hard time understanding the new dynamics, obviously. I suppose he thought it would endear him, make everybody think what a funny old eccentric man he is. I just thought it was kind of sad, because I know that he admires my SO's mom, but if he thought this was the way to impress her, he was dead wrong. Then at the end of the meal, we were sitting over table having a discussion about the world, etc., and Daddy starts in on his theory of religion, most of which I happen to agree with, but know better than to speak of in "mixed" company. Abruptly, my SO's mom decided it was time to get the hell out of here, and she did, quickly, calling an old friend she wanted to visit. Her leaving, from phone call to driving off down the road, took less than 5 minutes. It was like her back was on fire to get out of here. So.... this'll be the last time I'll have them both here at the same time.

Was a small Thanksgiving meal, and unconventional. We had smoked brisket instead of turkey and dressing. I had made potato salad last night, and green bean casserole this morning. The apple pie was pretty but not as tasty as I had hoped. The apples were, I think, too sweet. Anyway, it's over. We finally got rid of Daddy, too, and now it's just the two of us, the way we really like it best. I opened a bottle of pinot grigio and we're watching a little football, just chillin.

The holidays make me realize how satisfied with my life I already am. The only thing better would be if we could pack up and head to the mountain house.

Onward ....

A Visit With My Grandson

Spent a perfect afternoon with my grandson yesterday. I headed off kind of dreading it because the last few times have been dicey, with him being a moody 13-year old, sullen then sunny, you never know what you're in for from one time to the next. He was waiting for me on the front porch, raced over to the car to give me a big hug, and help me carry in things I had brought -- gifts for his mom and the new baby, one of my old, cleaned up aquariums for him. I was delighted that he was eager for my visit. Later, his mom told me he had been counting down the days.

He was hungry for Chinese, he told me right off. So we went to lunch. I gave him a time limit of 10 minutes to rattle on and on about his video games. I don't think he even took the whole ten. So I eased up and let him refer to his games throughout the day, but he really didn't much. I think having the new baby in the house has made him happy, or maybe it's the general atmosphere of happiness that pervades their home that's rubbed off on him. But it was good to see him so cheerful. We talked about his braces, his football, the upcoming Christmas party, his cats, my cat, the new house in New Mexico, he definitely wants to come to stay there this next summer for part of the time.

We put flowers on Mother's and Grandmother's graves. We went to the pet store to outfit the aquarium. I got ideas for Christmas gifts for him. We rode around town and I showed him some of my old stomping grounds. The neighborhood I grew up in has really gone down. He kept calling the people he saw standing around "gang-bangers." Maybe he's right. I know I was in a hurry to drive on through the area. People around there looked pretty rough.

We got back to his house and the new baby was awake. I got to hold her and feed her a bottle. She's cute cute the way all babies are at 6 weeks old. His parents seem delighted. I didn't get home until nearly 6 o'clock. Just wish it wasn't so far and I could go more often. Most of the time I feel like a lousy grandmother. But he seems to love me anyway. He told me so just before I got in the car to make the 2-hour drive back home.

Onward ....

Trying the Amazon Thing

I signed up with Amazon to be an Associate. Actually, I did it because I would like to sell all these hardcover LILY books I have in my storage closet. See, I bought out the 3rd printing of that book, thinking I would rather store them than have them appear on a remainder table, but now I have them and they're getting old, so I thought signing up to sell them as an Amazon Associate would be a way to get them to readers. Anyway, with the Associate program comes a way to link to your blog, so I'm seeing how the whole thing works. I think it would be kind of cool to mention a book I happen to be reading, and then having a link to that book on Amazon. The way I think it will work is that a hotlink will appear on the title, and then with one click, the blog reader will be taken to a way to buy that book from Amazon. I'm not absolutely certain that's the way it goes, but I'll give it a try.

There's so much to learn with all this new technology. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by it and just give up. But I would like to have my books out there a little more, or again, whatever. And when I read a book I really love, I like to share that information, as well. I've reviewed some books for Amazon, so I thought, why not. I guess if I get this down, maybe I'll look into getting some of my books on Kindle.

At any rate, here goes with that. It's worth a try.

Onward ....

Still Reading ....

My friend's novel in manuscript, it's got so much to do with me, as much to do with me as with him I'm sure. There are some really profound things in it, things that stop me. Here's one: "I came to understand that novelists are strictly observers. At first I struggled against it, agonized over it. And then ... I accepted it. I'm fascinated by life, just not terribly involved in it."

Well --- wow!

That's how I used to feel. Not anymore. I'm completely involved in it, 100%. Not just observing anymore but actively participating. I've said before that I lived vicariously through my characters because they lived much more interesting lives than I did, loved more, grieved more, felt more. They were a substitute for the real thing. Now, I have the real thing. And maybe that's why the fire in the belly is gone. I no longer need the substitutions.

It's not that it isn't something I haven't already figured out, it's just that my friend put it so succinctly. And there's more. No wonder I'm loving this book, can hardly put it down. It's terribly disturbing to me that it hasn't been able to find a home. Has the reading public become so shallow?

My SO dispatched the damned armadillo that's been wrecking havoc on the yard. It's not in my nature to feel gleeful when any creature dies, but this one had done so much damage and spoiled so much hard labor, I quickly buried any pang of regret I felt about its demise. Good riddance! That's one thing about living in the country. You have to make decisions, life or death ones, play God.

Onward ....

Other Writer's Work

A friend of mine asked me to read a manuscript he is having trouble selling. I got it FedEx on Saturday but didn't start reading it until today. I'm enjoying it, it's good work, but it's really making me want to work on my novel now. And I find myself in a funk this evening about it. It's just so hard to set everything else aside, and I don't know why. I used to not have this trouble. Anyway ....

Had a massage this morning -- very mediocre, but more tales for my article on getting massages, finding a good therapist. This one definitely was not good and I won't be going back there. Tonight my muscles are all tight and I got in the jacuzzi. Pretty sorry excuse for a jacuzzi, too. I had such a good one in my transition house. This one just cannot compare. Of course, it's also twenty years older, and was built for people who are flat as boards. The jets, I am not kidding, are no more than 3 inches off the bottom of the tub. Plus there are only four of them. You have to contort to get the achy parts under the stream of water. It just is hardly worth it. But it's wet outside, drizzly, has been that way for three days now, and the hot tub needs draining. The last time we got in it, it was like sitting in milk.

So I'm in a sort of pissy mood and can't seem to bring myself out of it. Really wish we could go back to the mountains. I just hate that we have to wait for two whole months. Sigh!

Onward .....