Making New Memories, What?

The Christmas blues are upon me. It's starting to affect my every day life. We have had way WAY too much of it this year, too many houseguests, too many gatherings, just too much period. I'm ready for life to get back to normal, calmer, less stress, less cooking, less have-tos, less. We have one more thing, and then it's over. I'll be taking down all the decorations probably by Christmas Day night.

And isn't it just pitiful that it isn't even officially Christmas yet and I already feel this way? What has happened to us that we make ourselves insane with all this STUFF that is supposed to be fun? Part of the trouble, I think, is this "memory" thing we humans have in our brains. I want to make new memories, but it's hard to let go of the old memories, and I still feel all the old demands even though they really aren't there anymore. Unless I make them be there, which I have a habit of doing. More and more, I think ignoring the holidays sounds like a good idea. Or at the very least, doing something COMPLETELY different, like booking a cruise, or taking a road trip. Wouldn't it be nice to spend Christmas in a B&B somewhere like Ireland, where the traditions are their own, and where we would be forced to think outside the box, as they say? Next year, we plan to go to the cabin early and spend Christmas there. I think that sounds wonderful.

The children's book I wrote earlier this year has come back form-rejected from yet another publisher. Guess it isn't as outstanding and original as I thought. Also guess credentials don't mean much. I'm surprised by the form rejections. I'm also surprised by how long it takes to get a response. Publishing has certainly changed since the 90s. If I had someone who could illustrate the book, I swear, I would self-publish the damned thing.

This little book has been a sort of tipping my toe in, testing the water again. And I don't like the chill I'm feeling. It doesn't do much to make me want to finish the endless novel, that's for sure. Yet, I have been contacted by two readers in the past month who had just read one of my books and wanted to get in touch. Both felt moved enough to write to me, and that just shows me that the kind of books I have written and would like to write again, are not out of style. I think it's the publisher's who get it wrong, but then, I've had that opinion for a long long time.

Onward .....

Raspberry Pie, Manuscript Submissions, & a Hot-Tubbing Frog

Made a pie with the raspberries we brought home from New Mexico. They had been in the freezer, and I just thought they needed to be used. The pie is so-so. It thickened up just fine, but the raspberries have an odd flavor to me, almost molasses-like. I think it might be why most of the recipes I looked up used raspberries along with something else, like pears, rhubarb, other berries, cherries. They aren't really a stand-alone fruit in a pie, I guess. It is certainly not horrible, and my SO as been eating it with ice cream and whipped cream and seems to really enjoy it. But then, frankly, he's a sweet freak and would probably like anything with sugar in it. Wish I could eat all that stuff and not get fat, but it's just not in my DNA, I guess.

In the hot tub last night, we found a frog. When we lifted the lid, there floating on the absorber, which is a piece of foam rubber shaped like a smiley face, was a tree frog about an inch long. No telling how long he had been there under the cover, but my SO really got a laugh out of it, said he looked like the frog was hot-tubbing, but I'm sure he got trapped under there and the absorber was his life raft. Anyway, my SO fished him out and put him in the oak tree beside the patio.

Have done no more work on the novel, but I did finally get fed up waiting for the publisher where I had submitted the children's book last spring. I write them a letter withdrawing the submission, and at the same time, made four copies of the manuscript and cover letter, and sent it to four places at once. Hell with it. In another week or so, I plan to send out four more. I'm tired of this "exclusive listing" stuff. Odds are only one would take it anyway, in the best of circumstances. It's pretty much the same thing I did when I sold LILY. I think in some ways I've just become too timid or complacent. That fire-in-the- belly-thing again.

Meanwhile, we're still waiting to hear on the New Mexico house. What a huge hassle this whole thing has been. We feel like we're in purgatory.

Onward ....

Killing Frost

It's been a week since I posted here. A busy one, too. I've hardly had a minute to stop to think let alone actually put some words down. First it was going to the Coast to batten things down for the bad weather we were expecting. While we were there we had breakfast with my aunt and uncle and visited for two hours aboard their sailboat. They were about to move the boat to a different harbor to watch a lighted yacht parade. The weather turned against them, though, and they never made it there. We had originally planned to go along, and we're glad we didn't. They got as far as the ship canal and decided the wisest thing would be to turn back. So I think they missed the parade as well, but at least everybody stayed safe.

We had snow flurries on Friday. Highly unusual for early December in this part of the world. Along with all the other unusual climate events that have been happening over the last decade, I think the case for climate change is pretty well clinched. We stayed in and put up the Christmas tree. I made some 9-bean soup with the Thanksgiving ham we had leftover from my SO's family gathering last Saturday. It was good but it made gallons. We froze some, and took some to Daddy. We're going to have to have a smorgasborg of leftovers from the freezer soon. We've been labeling things, but I was looking this morning at all the little containers in there: stuffed cabbage, shrimp carbonara, etoufee, cowboy stew, Bahamian rum cake slices, orange spice cake slices, corn pudding. It will be a mini-feast when we finally do dive into all this food.

In fact, I'm getting kind of tired of all the eating we've been doing. Both of us need to lose weight, me more than him, and we've both been saying we planned to lose at least ten pounds before Denver the second week in January. Obviously, that's not going to happen. I need to pull out the treadmill but don't seem to ever find the extra time it would take to get on the thing and spend a half hour. I guess I'm not dedicated to it at the present moment. I look enviously at all the clothes in my closet I cannot wear but for some reason that just hasn't been enough of an incentive. I guess I'm just destined to struggle with this from now on.

The cold weather took its toll on the flora outside. After a record low of 26 for the day, we ventured out to survey the damage. The esparanza at the end of the patio looks as if it might be dead. The foilage and flowers are dark green mush now. I'll keep an eye for bark damage, but think I might have to chop this one off at the ground. The pecan tree lost all its leaves overnight and they blanketed the part of the driveway where they fell. Out on the long part of the drive, two durantas I planted in the spring look to have fared about as well as the esparanza, and most disturbing, the three little crepe myrtles we have babied along since we moved in, through last winter and this summer's serious drought, also look like they're swabbed in green mush. I had the foresight to bring in the gorgeous bougainvillea basket and it actually seems to be thriving in the sunroom, but I'm sick over these losses. First it was the drought, then the roofers, and now this freak snowstorm.

However, when you're dealing with three acres, there's just no way to save everything. On a positive note, the rye grass the SO planted is lush and green and seemed to repel the killing frost that lay on all the rest of the ground yesterday morning.

Meanwhile, three more volunteers have read the children's book. It's always odd to see the different perspectives one reader will have from another. I have a tendency to doubt myself, and am often too ready to make changes against my better judgment. I did that and the very next reader complained about some of the new changes. So I'm back to the original and just a little confused. The third readers were parents of two preschool children. I probably got the best feedback from them. But I'm going to let the thing set for a while yet. The book is however, 99.9% finished, and at this point, any changes I make will be minor. I plan to get the manuscript into a submissions format, and send it off the first week in January. It's time for the thing to fly or fail.

Onward ....